I hope that your day went well. My day was exciting because I chose to extend my Thanksgiving Break for a day. I was feeling under the weather so I stayed in and I got some rest. In any event, I have been thinking about the blog that I wrote on whether men know what they want or not. In that blog, I addressed 10 things that men want from women (from my point of view). The more I thought about that post, I knew that I had to address the things that women want from men. At that, do women know what they want in general? I plan to address this question as it relates to women and what they seek in relationships.
Here are 10 things that women want from the men in their lives:
1. Women want communication from their mates. Often times, we come home from a hard day at work and we want to talk about what happened during the day. But often times, we have to compete with the Internet and ringing cell phones. In order to communicate effectively, it is best to focus completely on the other person. For men and women, turn off the TV and the cell phones so that you can increase your communication with each other.
2. We want a man who can listen (and not solve the problem). As women, we have moments where we just want to vent. We don't need men to solve anything....we just want you to listen. Too often, men come in as Mr. Fix It and they try to fix the problem so that we can stop complaining about it. That is not what women want. Women want someone who can listen to them. If you can listen to them, you will be on the right track to understanding women.
3. Women want a man that is independent from his mother. Let me jump right into this one: You know that you have a mama's boy when the beginning of every sentence is "My mama said.....". Women do not need this kind of man because the relationship will never have two people...it will always include his mother's opinion. As women, they need a man who can speak on his own. It is ok to consult his mother every now and then but not on every single detail of his life. If he can stand on his own two feet, he is well on his way to finding an independent woman who is doing the same thing.
4. Women want a man who knows how to save money. Some women like to save money for a rainy day. Too often, people spend all of their money as soon as they get their check. But when a rainy day comes, there is no money left to cover the extra expenses that have come up. For women, they need a man who likes to save. If he likes to save, he can help her to save her money as well. Now, I am not saying that women want a man that is cheap. No!! Women want a man who can provide for his family on a budget.
5. Women want a man who can do what he has to do to keep her satisfied in the bedroom. It is time out for the "wham-bam-thank you-maam" business. Women, in general, seek a deeper emotional bond with the person that they are in a relationship with. They seek someone who will take their time to please them from the top of their head all the way down to the soles of their feet. But I will also say that it is important for the woman to do the same thing for her man. Intimacy begins mentally for women, so men, it is time to start mentally stimulating the woman in your life. If you don't, someone else will!
6. Women want a man who has a job. Yes, I said it. They seek to find a man who is willing to work hard for the family. Most women are willing to work with their men so that they can make their home life as happy as it can be. When a man has a job, it shows the woman that he can provide for her and their family. I will go a step further and say that two people working together can help each other as they go through the struggles of life. But men, women need a man who has a job. Not a hustlin' job but a real job that pays real money with benefits.
7. Women want a man who is not trying to be their father or a dictator. Men, by the time you meet a woman, you must know that she has already been raised. She does not need a second father. She needs a man who will love her and he will be in her corner no matter what. Women need a man who can be there when they need them. But remember that she was an adult when you met her....she does not need you to raise her. If she needs advice, she can go to her father. But for men, be the man who can grow with your woman over the lifespan.
8. Women need a man who supports them. Too often, women tell their men that they want to accomplish a goal and the man shoots down their goal as if they can't achieve it. If a woman wants to accomplish a dream, you need to back her up so that she will know that she can complete it. If you don't want to back her up, at least keep quiet so that she can pursue her dreams. Men, support your women so that no one comes along and gives your woman the compliments that you should be giving her. If you are standing beside her, you need to be her #1 fan as she moves towards her goals.
9. Women need a man that is dependable. If you say that you are going to do something, you need to keep your word and do it. If you can't do it, at least let the woman know so that she won't have to depend on you. It is sad but many men promise that they will do things and they do not hold up their end of the deal. Women do it as well. But as adults, we need to be mindful of what we say. People will hold you to your word so be careful of how you use your words with other people.
10. Lastly, women need a man who is a MAN. These days, women cannot deal with little boys that exist in a man's body. If you are a little boy, you need to be living in your mother's house. No woman is trying to raise a little boy. She needs to be with a man who knows how to handle his business and take care of his house. If you are a little boy and you are not ready to commit, don't walk down the aisle. Save you and your woman the embarrassment of getting a divorce within 5 years of marriage. In any event, little boys need their mothers while grown men need to be with grown women. (I will stop there before I get carried away.)
Women, do you know what you want?
If you don't know, now is a good time to address what you need in your relationship.
